Pure Common Sense

I just got done reading the new book by award-winning actor and comedian Denis Leary. I did not fully know what to expect when I started reading this book – it’s called Why We Suck: A Feel-Good Guide to Staying Fat, Loud, Lazy and Stupid. I had no intention of buying a random book written by a celebrity, ever, but after seeing that title sitting on the shelf at a book store….well come on how could I not?! And he’s standing there on the cover holding a firecracker and brandishing a smug, “I’m awesome and I know I’m awesome” look on his face. If you turn the book around and look at the back cover, you’ll see the title up top says “why we really, really suck…” and you’ll find the “reasons why” below. Denis makes fun of a few of his fellow celebrities (or just lets them makes fun of themselves, depending how you see it) with a few quotes of their own. They kind of remind me of the typical things you might expect a celebutard to say. I think he might have even used the word celebutard at some point in the book – would not surprise me. I think he did….maybe he didn’t, maybe I’m imagining it…oh well, too lazy to go back and check now.

After reading this book I found out I have a heck of a lot more in common with Denis Leary than I would ever have thought. The man is Irish, the man’s family is Catholic, most of all, the man likes to talk in plain, old-fashioned Common Sense! If Denis Leary posted on my blog, he would seem right at home. Now, Why We Suck: A Feel-Good Guide to Staying Fat, Loud, Lazy and Stupid – you can deduce from the title of the book that he says some pretty controversial stuff in this book – a lot of it. He probably angered a lot of people with his blunt honesty. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if someone mentioned in the book tried to sue him for libel – crazy people in this country try to sue for just about everything nowadays. I found myself agreeing with Denis pretty much every step of the way, though. Now, he’s a Democrat and I’m a Republican, so there were a few things throughout the book that I might not have said or I would have said something similar but in a much different way. Other than that, I felt like Denis pretty much hit right on the money – when you’re talking Common Sense, there’s only so many directions that it could go.

There are some funny names for each chapter in this book – twenty in all. They include “Your Kids Are Not Cute,” “I Had Sex With Kathie Lee Gifford (And She Was Amazing),” “Autism Shmautism” and “Matt Dillon is a Giant Fag.” As you can tell, there are a lot of funny surprises in this book – I’ll attempt to refrain from giving away too much. Just brace yourself when you read it because you’re about to have your politically correct worldview shattered by the lovable Christmas jewel thief/kidnapper from The Ref.

The first major theme of the book – and possibly the best, in my opinion, is the one on kids these days. Denis gives a down-to-earth look at how children, while cute, can be a bunch of whiny insufferable brats. He also defends corporal punishment as a method of discipline and a way to assert yourself as a parent. I am unsure about my personal view regarding corporal punishment and whatever various effects it might have, but I can certainly sympathize with Denis. Denis Leary and Bill O’Reilly are in complete agreement that a lot of today’s parents have become spineless doormats begging their kids for affection by spoiling them. And the two authors are absolutely right. It’s not good practice by the parents and its not good treatment for the kids. Parents giving you what you want when you want and letting you get away with murder is just not how the world works – sorry. This is the reason that contemporary young adults feel so entitled and are ungrateful of their gifts. They need to learn some self-sufficiency and get it through their heads what they are entitled to – nothing, repeat, nothing. At the age of five an American child no reason whatsoever to feel entitled. They have by the grace of God been born in America in the twenty-first century, which is already an unlikely gift to receive – and they have furthermore lived in good health to their current age. They’ve won a freaking lottery. If they have any further privilege – yes, privilege, like being in a middle class home, a safe neighborhood, a reasonably functional household, or dare I say it – multiple or all of those – forget about it. You are a lucky son (or daughter) of a gun, so don’t complain about anything and put the gifts you’ve given to good use. So far they have contributed nothing to anyone and have only received, not given. To ask for more is saying a lot, but to ask for more so indignantly is unfounded. If you have kids who complain tell them they’re lucky not to be starving in the third world and to shut up.

So, back to Denis Leary’s book here, which is in fact the topic of my post today. I often trail off down an offbeat train of thought – it’s a flaw in my writing which I admit to. Mr. Leary talks about his own life story growing up in a Catholic household within a typical sitcom-like neighborhood in Massachusetts and becoming an actor through a long and humorous career path. It is a fine story and will make you laugh more than once. Oh, and his conversations with his parents – can’t forget about those.

Now, of course I have a similar down-to-earth Common Sense worldview on life to Denis Leary and therefore really enjoyed reading his rantings. This does not mean that our perspectives do not diverge at all. I took some issue with his portrayal of talking about the Monica Lewinsky scandal during the Clinton years and his sympathizing with the former President. The fact is that the President is a role model for the nation as well as its Head of State. Therefore he or someday she has a responsibility to set a good example. I get sick of people saying that “it was ok for him to do it – that’s a private matter, but the bad part is that he lied about it.” No, the lying makes it worse, but the fact that he committed adultery is bad. And don’t give me a list of other big names who have done the same thing – that doesn’t make it ok, that just means multiple people have the same flaw. Extramarital affairs are selfish, degrading and deserve no acceptance from society.

Another part of the book which is one of my favorites is the section on sexes and racial stereotypes. Denis mentions those themes a lot so you could argue this section takes up half the book or you could narrowly define it as one or two chapters. Denis employs a realist view of such subjects and there are a lot of aspects that we may have to accept about prejudice while protecting equal opportunity at the same time. I read an article about six months ago on difference feminism, which is a form of philosophy which sees the two sexes as different and valuable in their own way. Denis is able to give a down-to-earth perspective which would infuriate radicals who see otherwise, but is overall in a humorous and (mostly) not-that-offensive way. He makes fun of all racial stereotypes including his own (and mine) so while the talk is prejudiced to actually perceive prejudice in Dr. Denis Leary is absurd and shows evidence that you might be uptight and thin-skinned.

Dr. Leary is a huge fan of Oprah and talks about that in succinct detail. I must admit I was a little taken aback as I am not a member of Oprah’s typical target audience, but it was an entertaining part of the book that you might find hard to disagree with.

The only legitimately offensive part of the book might be the part where he lists an alternative version of the Ten Commandments near the end and he basically implies that Catholic priests are all child molesters, but then again he did make fun of pretty much everybody for everything so in that context its not as bad.

So ends Denis Leary’s rigorous social commentary. One of my favorite movies of his would have to be The Ref. It’s a movie about a jewel thief who robs from a mansion in rich suburban Connecticut with his partner and has to go on the run after an alarm goes off and kidnaps a dysfunctional family for the night – of whom Kevin Spacey plays the dad – and then tries to pass himself off as their marriage counselor. I grew up in suburban Connecticut myself and I totally understand where the people in the movie are coming from. It’s one of the two movies my family watches every year at Christmas time – the other, is, of course, It’s a Wonderful Life. Funny thing is that they’re polar opposites. They are both good movies in different ways, impossible to compare the two. What better way to celebrate the birth of Christ than to digest the down to earthiness of Dr. Denis Leary – or should I say Dr. Wong?